A few lessons I’ve learnt in life that might make sense to others…
Tie the loose ends
There are a bunch of things on your mind; little things that constantly nag you, small hiccups that come up just when you’re starting to have a good time… FIX EM’. I’m not talking about big life changing steps, if you’re gay and your name is Mike Huckabee, you may want to think a little before opening the closet door, but I am taking about waking up an hour early on Sunday morning and making calls to those 5 friends you haven’t touched base with for the last 2 years. And in the meantime, they’ve popped out a couple of kids… or about going to the doc to fix that muscle pull from the snowboarding trip you took…. 4 months ago.
Figure out what it is, schedule time for it, and go do it. Most of us cannot multitask and the more little loose ends you tie up, you’ll free yourself to make better decisions on the big stuff and have a higher quality of life.
So you’ve been in the dumps for a while, and you’ve accepted that as a fact of life. You speak in a lower voice, you are risk averse, you’re easily brushed aside… what gives?? Let me give you a hint, it’s not bad fortune. It’s up-to you to stand up and make a difference in your life. So step out of your shell, smile, don’t care too much about other people’s opinion and be optimistic. Really there is no way to tell the cause and effect here, you’re probably in second gear because you don’t wanna make the effort to switch (or get an automatic), not because you wound up with a wilty 2 stroke auto-rickshaw made in India.
If there is one thing that keeps the world going, it is optimism. Inherently we know that at any point there are 2 options: make things better or worse… i’ll choose better any day.
Be Kind to Others… and Yourself
You cant get 2 people together for a party or a movie, well neither can those 2 people, but that’s not the point. People have personalities that are just as complex (read warped) as yours. Be sensitive to them just as you might expect them to be to yours and give them a break.
Unwittingly or not, people end up giving off prepackaged vibes about themselves (cool guy, smart guy, corporate girl climbing the ladder… whatever). Call it peer pressure or just conditioning based on their experiences. However, I’ve often found people to be very different from the first impression they give off. And usually better in most cases. The way I look at it is that people have different priorities, different goals, different taboos and different upbringing, and that shapes their day to day behavior and the impressions they leave. Just leave it at that… cause you are no different in that sense.
You always wonder how these huge organizations, sports clubs, dance clubs, hobby clubs etc come about. Comes down to one word… enthusiasm. Some little (or large) prick got enough people excited enough to participate in something and it just took off. There were a lot of cool people hanging around who are still doing just that… hanging around while that prick went on to enrich their life and the lives of others. And probably made a lot of money doing so. And maaaaaybe got laid too (it’s a stretch though).
The fact of life is that people are busy and they’re all caught up in their own versions of the same problems that you’re facing. So shed you inhibitions, expose your enthusiasm and go out there participate. You never know what you’re going to find and create. Have fun.